Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Dr Who Summary

Dr Who vs werewolves – this one was alright with a pretty good, scary werewolf (who turned out to be an alien who wanted to infect Queen Victoria with werewolf germs so the royal family would turn into alien werewolves themselves or something). The characters spent most of the time running round corridors screaming while the wolf went “Grrr”. In the end it turned out that Prince Albert had handily built a moon powered werewolf slaying laser in the back room. What are the chances etc. Pauline Collins was v good as Queen Victoria and there was a cool bit at the end when she said “get out of my sight, you freaks!” to the Dr and Billy. Fun but nonsensical.

Dr Who vs Giles-from-Buffy – I had high hopes for this one but it was all a bit annoying. Mickey summons the Dr and Billy to a suburban school where Giles-from-Buffy is headmaster and is up to evil shenanigans that are too boring and convoluted to explain. Basically he turns into a bat a lot and is making all the kids into call centre IT zombies or something. Sarah Jane – my fave assistant from kiddy days - is also onth ecase and appears with crappy robot dog K-9. There is lots of emo whining about how the Dr abandoned her, about how the Dr is sad when humans rot and die, about how Billy is jealous of all the Dr’s other birds. Etc etc etc. Just shut up the lot of you and smite some aliens please thanks. Disappointing.

Dr Who vs Clockwork Robots – Oh my god, this one was the most nonsensical so far. A spaceship in the future sends killer robots back through time to kill famous French lady Madame De Pompadour and steal her BRANE, solely because the ship is called the same thing and is so determined to repair itself that it would rather expend vast amounts of time and energy creating multiple time portals rather than just hauling ass to the nearest Kwik Fit. Oh whatever. The robots are quite creepy in the way that all killer dolls/shop dummies are creepy but the story is just nonsensical. - More emo whining as the time windows cover all of Madame De P’s lifespan and the Dr is sad to see her die. I am sensing a theme and I hope it doesn’t end up with Billy in rubbish old lady make up.

Coming soon – Cybermen! Gasp!

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